8.29.2004

Top Ten Things That Should Happen But Won’t


I was going to make a list of predictions about the upcoming GOP convention, but
then I realized something. The only thing to be said about the upcoming
convention is that it is going to suck, a lot. So, in place of predictions I
have the Top Ten Things That Should Happen But Won’t at the GOP
convention:
10. GW should not give a speech and they should play that JibJab cartoon
instead.
9. Saddam Huessian should be dragged out in a Pulp Fiction Abu
Gharib style gimp suit.
8. Rod Paige should be shoved off stage by Donald Rumsfeld, because
education isn’t as important as the WOT.
7. Bring Mike Bloomberg onstage in a nurse outfit.
6. Someone should apologize for Alan Keyes.
5. Bring out The Twins in nurse outfits.
4. Point out that no one in the party is as ridiculous as Dennis
Kuccinich or Al Sharpton.
3. Remind people that the Supreme Court is on the line this November.
2. Use piles of Monopoly money to show how relatively poor GW, Cheney
and even John Edwards are combined next to John Kerry.
1. Remind everyone that the GOP is the party of
conservatives.
I went into this list thinking it was a going to be a joke, but looking at it I
feel sad.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home