6.03.2003

THE DEMS’ ONLY CHANCE




So far as I can tell, the Democrats have only one real shot at knocking President Bush from his pedestal. It’s a hail mary, but given the financial state of their Party, it might be the only shot the Democrats have.


As the Group of 9 has managed to meet in South Carolina, to less than impressive results, it begs for comparison to the other irrelevant “G” meeting that President Bush just recently took off early from.


With this collection of misfits, has-beens, and never-will-be’s, it takes some creativity to come up with a strategy to help them win. And while I’m usually hesitant to offer free advice to water-cooler communists, in the spirit of competition, here it goes…


First, they need to collect themselves, and rally around the idea of voting rights for all Americans, regardless of age. While Bill Clinton is on his soapbox about amending the 22nd Amendment, he needs to boldly propose amending the 26th as well. After all, why shouldn’t 17 year-olds be able to vote? Or 16? Or 15??? Allowing anyone who can make it to the polls to vote, needs to become a united Democrat rally cry.


Amendment XXVI

Section 1. The right of citizens of the United States, who are eighteen years of age or older, to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the Unites States or by any state on account of age.


It might not be easy to pass such an amendment, but it’s an idea they must push.


With that out of the way, they can get on to the real beauty. They’ve got only one shot at this, and can’t afford to stray from it at all.


Someone imaginative, someone who some say already lives in a dream world, like Dennis Kucinich for instance, then can walk into the DNC Convention, and put into effect Phase II of this plan. Keep in mind, this is the only way the Democrats can bring down Bush.


On the floor of the Convention, Rep. Kucinich, in nomination speeches changed to take place Saturday morning can address the delegates:


Fellow Democrats. With a clear message to our Party, the American people have told us again and again, “No Thanks.” No thanks to tired, recycled candidates. No thanks to tired, recycled ideas. No thanks to the politics of pandering. One man can make a difference, and we need to unite behind him if we’re to keep the Republicans from stealing another election.


With the adoption of the amended twenty-sixth amendment, we need a candidate who will represent all Americans, especially those just brought into the big tent of American voters. We need a candidate popular enough with the people that he will inspire all Americans. We need a candidate who can put smiles on the faces of children and warmth into the hearts of parents. We need a candidate who has small business experience, to right this sinking economic ship. Only one man can fill this bill. Ladies and Gentlemen, fellow Democrats, Citizens of America, I nominate Sponge Bob Square Pants for President!






With scores of 5 year olds flocking to vote for their favorite animated character, the Democrats will have done the impossible, give their Party life (even if they needed a cartoon character to do so), and bring down the 800 lb gorilla, President George W Bush.

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